Humility is trusting God and others with me.
One of the images of humility we cling to in the Scriptures is Jesus washing the feet of the disciples. Jesus, in complete humility, trusting in the love of the Father, stooped down to the feet of his friends, and washed their feet. (John 13) We read in Hebrews 4:15,
For we do not have a high priest (Jesus) who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but One who has been tempted in all things as we are, yet without sin. He knows our story and has made it possible for us to live humbly in our relationships with our spouses and others.
The first practical application for us in marriage is to trust the heart (redeemed hearts made new), of our spouse. (2 Corinthians 5:17-21) Our new hearts are well intentioned, good willed at the core. Living humbly means we live openly and honestly before one another. We have no reason to keep secrets or hide, because the essence of humility is derived from the grace of God and our new identity in Christ.
So, when my wife does something that irritates me or I fail to pay attention to some details that are important to her, instead of going into character assassination mode, we have learned to step into humility and allow God's waves of grace to wash over the moment. We trust each others hearts, which means that we realize that we are not purposely trying to make life more difficult for each other. When my daughters say; "Dad, take a chill pill"; I know there hearts are for me, not to mock me. In humility, I own my attitude and take the "pill".
The key is to take the equivalent of a "chill pill" and step into trusting the heart of your spouse. When you do this, you step into the realm of grace, where love matures us into the image of Christ. Our marriages become the signs and wonders He destined for us.
Vic and Monique
We are all about helping your marriage thrive.